A little rant about changing my name after getting married
I wanted to change my name. I just didn’t want all the annoyance.
I’ve been married to my husband for 9 years and I still have a bunch of officially things in my maiden name. I didn’t hate my maiden name but I thought it would just be easier if I changed it. I know it was the right move. Worst case scenario: my husband is in the hospital and I need to prove we’re married so I can see him — boom — see ID.
Also, I wanted it to be easier for the kids. Good golly, no hyphens. Just one name for all. I never thought about asking him to change his name. Never even occurred to me (and I call myself a feminist??). I heard of a couple that decided to change both of their last names to a completely new one. Neither particularly liked their maiden ones. They went with Foxly. (What would I pick?)
The main reason I knew it would be easier is because we’re a mixed race family. Also, I was raised in a mixed race family. I’ve never discussed name changes with my parents. I just knew deep down that it would be easier in life if I had the same last name as everyone else in my family. Mixed race families have enough confusion to overcome, no need to add in multiple last names.
And so, still 9 years out, I’ve got financial accounts and more in my old name. There are just so many. And if I want to properly register in Medium as a writer, I need to change one of my accounts. It’s yet another reminder of the extra work women “need to” endure in life. I know it was my choice. It’s just… annoying.
But thanks to this annoyance, I had something to write about today. Thanks for letting me rant. I feel better that some good came out of it.
